Difference between revisions of "Talk:Atlantis"

Revision as of 14:51, 13 August 2007

(Brandon)This is so cool!

The story is going to the publishers as soon as I get it at least 250 pages long, or less depending on font size. What size do authors usually use? I am using size 12 right now.

You and I will both need to check it over a couple times to see if it is worthy, and I will make copies to give to other adults I know to see if they have any suggestions, and I will give you some to give out too.

I can't wait until it's accepted, even if it takes a thousand tries, I won't give up (maybe at 10001)

In the meantime, just put any of your awesomest ideas here so we can both read them, and make suggestions

(Will)Hi!!

I have a concern. Completely mind-blowingly awesome as all your action scenes are,i am afraid that we need some sort of plot. It might explain how Matt and Tom met in the first place or there might be some sort personal-life sort of thing about Tom. For instance, Tom might be Holly's boyfriend and they might have met before they were recruited to Atlantis. What were Tom, Matt, Holly, and Scarlett's lives like before Atlantis? Should that be included in chapter two: Flashbacks? For some reason just the whole "I'm Tom and here i am in all these awesome action scenes with an assault rifle on the island of atlantis and yay, look! There's matt, my best friend. Lets go fight! For some reason i know holly and scarlet who are at the head of an elite squadron..." you get my point: we need a plot!!!!!

(Brandon)Yes, your absolutley right. I think we should do like we discussed on the phone, and have them meet at school, when Matt realizes about Tom, etc, huge action scene, etc, then they meet Scarlett via Holly in a government 'camp'.

(Will)Also, on another random note, instead of the atlantis escapade, book 1,2, and 3 how about (for the title)

The Atlantis Escapade: Part I

The Atlantis Conspiracy: Part II

The Atlantis Ultimatum: Part III

Oh, and by the way also, i finished the front cover illustration!

(Brandon) Good idea, and I love the Ultimatum part. Good job on the cover, and we'll fix the motorcycle when you come back.

(Will)New idea. Again, another minor one.

What about Holly carries a H&K XM8 and a FN P90 (search for google images if unfamiliar w/ the p90) as well as two knives in her pockets? Maybe, if we wanted to push it, we could give her some sort of 12 gauge shotgun too and a Glock 20

(Brandon) Good idea, and as we said, scratch the Glock, give her a Pancor Jackhammer, possibly two P90s, and a heavy machine gun version of the XM8.

(Will)As for Scarlet, what about she carries some sort of sniper rifle (i dont know many names of them), grenades, a knuckle knife, a beretta pistol(sorry, handgun, whatever), and either an uzi or an MP5k let me know as soon as you can!!

(Brandon)go with the MP5k, and like we said, the WA2000 or whatever.

(Will)Also, to keep you getting more and more also's, until they never end, i'd like to know what other illustrations you'd like me to do.

(Brandon) To recap (we've already discussed this mostly), the SWAT guy getting out of the SWAT truck, and how about Illustrations of all the guns we use in the story? We could even put little captions underneath telling the statistics, who uses them in the story, stuff like that. Another really helpful thing would be drawings of Dinosaurs (you saw my Ankylosaurus).

(Will)I finally came up with another name for telescape. What about Atlantis: the game? (Brandon) Sure thats fine. I like it.

(Will)What should chapter 1 in The Atlantis Conspiracy be about?

How about tom and matt are together, doing something, when they get the message that Holly and Scarlet's squad has gone missing?

The only question is, what are tom and matt going to be doing before they get the message? (Brandon) sitting back and eating potato chips in the Living quaters (LQ)

(Will)Then chapter two through chapter four will be tom and matt following where holly's squad went, getting captured and using kenesis powers to free themselves of the prison.

I might need some help (urgent) on the action scenes so far, because currently they are pretty dumb.

I know you wont be able to respond for about the next week, so i wont be expecting anything for a while.

And, with my help, of course, we need to aim for each book more about 500 pages, because, since it's a trilogy, not a neverending series, the books need to be fairly long.

See ya!

I've started to try my hand at illustrating some of the American soldiers. Do you want them to have the same helmet as Tom?

(Brandon) No, how about no helmet at all? In all the movies I see, (like Transformers lol) none of the special forces dudes have helmets. Some just have nothing, some might have a camo sweatband, etc.

(Will)I just got an idea for the covers of book 2 and 3. For book two, what about it shows Dr. Shang with a murderous look in his eyes, katanas and glocks and such ready to kill. In a fade-ish background, it would show Holly and Scarlet with handcuffs or something. As for the cover of book 3, it would show Tom closest to you, with Matt, Holly and Scarlett right behind him but still completely visible (you know what i mean; sort of like the cover of the Eragon movie). Then, again in a fade-ish background, there would be the Queen T-Rex roaring. Like the idea? (Brandon) Yeah I know exactly what you mean, and I love the idea.

I got an idea for the plot of the third book. The head honcho for the bad guys (whether that's the Queen T-Rex or some other guy) tells Tom's army in a negotiation that they have a choice- either surrender to the bad guys and meet no harm or die; the bad guys' army is constantly growing and is far from low on reinforcements. The bad guys (sorry, i dont know wat else to call them) decided to make this proposition in a council meeting. That would be why it's called the Atlantis Ultimatum: because Ultimatum means "a final decision"- well, sort of.

(Brandon) Yeah, except the 'good guys' refuse, instead choosing to fight. That will be the main part of the story, where Tom and the gang go and prove their worth to Queen Rex by single handedly capturing every enemy base except the main one, which is the most heavily defended, and so they go to all the other countries for support, almost everyone accepts, and they are about to attack, when Tom is gravely injured in a sneak attack, and Matt takes him to the Guru while Scarlett and Holly defend the newly captured bases. Their Tom learns new powers (yet to be thought of), and learns the only way (which is special) to defeat Queen Rex.

P.S. Remember to check the entire page each time you log on, because I like to respond to questions, etc, right under them, so just check the whole thing.

(Will) i guess u misunderstood me. i meant that the queen rex and her main most highly ranked followers would have a meeting and decide the whole ultimatum deal. (ya know, like you have to surrender or die and all that). then, they would confront tom and gang and tell them, and then everything else will be like you said. obviously they would refuse; i never would suggest that tom would give in.

(will)i finished the first sketch of the matt picture. im at the beach and there is bad internet connection; this is the first time i've been able to use the internet. anyway, about the matt picture, it shows most of his torso. it only shows about half of his body, but i'm sure ill do more matt illustrations anyway. it's not colored yet, but i couldn't bring my art kit, so it wont be colored for a while. it may be a while before i respond again (soooo sorry), so i'll try to get in all i can for now. i found the coolest weapon in my weapons book, although we probably wont use it in our books because it was only used in the 1500's. It's a carbine shotgun with a halberd on the gun barrel and a small butt so it is relatively the same shape as a halberd. there are a bunch of weapons like that and they are awesome.

(will)what about in addition to everything else matt has a usas 12?

(will) i made some plans for atlantis the game. i made a list of all of the types of troopers and heroes on both sides and all of their weapons and attacks (like in battlefront 2)

(Brandon) That's great, but one, you get to go choose your own weapons and stuff for yourself, two, I already have all the different skills and classes, and three, keep in mind its going to be a modern, virtual reality version of runescape, and we wont get to play as the heroes or anything. We will have NPCs (Non player characters) of Tom and the gang, but no one gets to play as them (except us, maybe). The USAS 12, i have a grudge against it cause it sucks so badly. Really heavy, slow reload time, jams alot, etc. A remmington or mossberg with the butt cut off would do nicely though. We can talk more about the layout of the game later, but for now, i can say that it is a free-world type thing like runescape, you can't win, you just play forever if u want, lots of skills and stuff like runescape, except cooler gameplay, and more add ons. Don't try to make it like battlefront 2. And i don't know if you saw, but I wan't all the soldiers to either have Tom's helmet, no helmet, or a camo sweatband.

This really stinks your not here, cause ive' been bored beyond belief the past couple days. Call me as soon as you get home, and we can have a lengthy conversation about anything. I need to talk to someone outside my family about cool things desperately!

(will) it'll be a miracle if i can respond again, but always be hopeful, 'cause i might. see ya!

(will) i started reading maximum ride. it is definitely one of my top five favorites of all time. it's all between max ride, alex rider, harry potter, art fowl, and either eragon or eldest. i just got it a day ago and im already on page 315. yeah, it's that good. i see where u get a lot of the expressions that you talk and write with. i still can't decide if it's better than eragon and h potter.

oh, and by the way, i know how u feel- hey, you were at the beach for a week as well. until i got that book, times where i'm not doing something were no picnic. I wanted to draw Dr. Shang, but i dont have paper and CVS closes at 2:00 in the afternoon. What the f***? my mom wont let me watch the matrix, and all the other movies we have are chick flicks. (like, gilmore girls, garden state, a river runs through it... yuck). But now that i have Maximum ride to read all those problems (except matrix) are solved. and i got yet another idea (sigh****)

how about shangie man wears one of the matrix coats? that would be characteristic.

anyway, i cant think of anything else to say, so see ya. I will be able to respond because the internet is up and running.

Respond!!! Please!!!

(Brandon) Yay! I like the idea with the matrix coats. Keep those ideas coming, cause the more, the better. So now I'm happy you have internet access. I'm also glad you've had a taste of James Patterson, he's my favorite author besides Christopher Paolini. Anyways, I've done a little writing in my book, gotten to the part where Matt comes, and added a couple scenes where Matt and Tom are looking for survivors in the building right after Tom's transformation. I should add a little more use of Tom's new abilities, cause it's kinda like: Yay! Im a superhuman. I slashed a guy. Ok, done, you can be the superhuman now. LOL. On a rather different note, I've stopped even trying to hold together our battlefront clan. no one has joined. Instead, I've made a clan on Runescape, well, it's actually more like a Wilderness group, and I'm training everybody up, etc, and theres' this new thing called clan chat, where it makes it easier to talk with clan members, and you can assign ranks and junk to your clan members. I've already got three recruits, as soon as more of my friends log onto Runescape, we will have more. We'd also like you to join, on my brothers account. We could trust you with it. I gotta go to lunch, but I'll type some more now that you'll actually be able to read it. See ya!

P.S. Don't forget, you can add something to the article page if you wanted.

(Brandon)Hey! I forgot to ask you, do you actually play runescape? If not, you should, or at least help out with our Wilderness group. We need more people to fight, because most of the wildy is all multi-combat area. But anyways, back to the Atlantis story I fixed up the beginning scene, as it was a little cheesy. I added a part where Tom calls in an air strike, and an A-10 thunderbolt roars over the trees, spewing bullets, missiles, etc at a Spinosaurus. I also have it where parts of the Spino's skin are bullet proof, mainly it's back, not it's belly or head, yada yada yada. You know wat i mean. Anyways the men rush for cover against it's bullet-proof armor-skin, etc, they battle, etc., etc, etc,. Yay. My scenes where I describe Raptors feeding after they've escaped their holding areas are rather gruesome. I'll save you the details, but it's pretty cool, and people like gory stuff. If you have any ideas for more talking scenes, I would be much obliged. I wanna have a scene where Tom is debriefed, but I don't know what kind of diolauge i should have (I know i spelled diolauge wrong, i dont care). Anyways, I'm almost to the scene where Tom remembers his fight with the SWAT dudes, but i want to have a boring scene before that, and i'll need your help for that. I'll read up on Clive Cussler novels, as he's really good at boring and action scenes. I also have a desperate concern. I think i might have left my sketchpad at your house, but i dont know for sure, even though i cant find it at mine. It would normally be okay, but i left my atlantis map in between the pages, and now im mapless. If you can't find it, Oh well. I wanted to revise it anyways. Well, I've written alot, and I can't think of much else to write, so im going to appeal to my dad to let me play computer. If you get the chance, try to play runescape, (if you want), cause thats wat im going to be playing mostly from now on. I'll see ya when you get back.

(will) Yes! finally we are getting a firm communication on this wiki thing. thanks to u, my response is going to be a loooooong one. ok, first off, i know exactly where ure notebook/maps are. Sorry. i didn't realize until thirty minutes after u left my house, and by then i had to clean my room and pack for my annoyingly long beach trip. anyway, the only time i would be available to spend the night is tommorow, tuesday(thanks to westminster orientation and everything). and about runescape, i tried to play once, but my computer couldn't take all of the information storage that was in it. it took like 3 hours to load. once i finally started playing the game, i had no idea what to do and i was totally and utterly bored. so, im gonna need some help if im gonna be able to play again. sorry, i would help, but im a total runescape dummy, and i would need some advisement if im going to get past like the first easy obstacle of starting a fire or watever. so runescape is pretty much a no-no until my dumminess is extinguished. and i think we should, instead of taking credit alone for the books that "we" write, i think we should just write action and boring story scenes and combine them. i mean i write or help with all of the boring story scenes and u write all of the action scenes in all of the books and i make suggestions. why, u ask? because, frankly, i suck at all action scenes, and u r a little bit too shabby with the boring story. anyway, on to the next subject, the matrix. i saw the first and second ones, and they are about the awesomest action scenes u can want, except for the fact that the plot is a little bit bizarre, with the slimy rebirth and everything. morpheus in the videogame that u were playing is nothing like the morpheus in the movie. the morpheus in the movie looks like mace windu, or something. now i know why your dad keeps calling me Mr. Anderson. anyway, would you rather have Dr. Shang have morpheus' jacket and suit or neo's? and i'm still yet to see the matrix revolutions, so dont tell me what happens. remember in the matrix one and two when neo is fighting the agents, and they are attacking him ferociously and he is just lazily blocking? then he easily twists smithy guy's arm at light speed and kicks him fifteen feet! remember when there are clones of the smith guy and neo bashes them all like roaches? it is so awesome. anyway, back to atlantis. i cant draw dr. shang till i get back and i dont have the computer with the atlantis conspiracy. i am low on ideas for everything about the story except for one. on the new map that u said we should make, how about around the queen rex's lair there are a bunch of atlantian guard outposts as heavy security. each of these outposts would be stationed by a greek temple sort of like a mini parthenon. there would be twenty outposts and each of them would have a fifty man atlantian officer squad. the atlantian officers would have the second best weapons in the world next to the american army, and the best training of any atlantian troops. what about each outpost has howitzers? the atlantians would have conventional howitzers, and the american army would have major upgrades. now let me tell you about this upgrade. it's called like archer something or other. it has a range of like 45 miles. it is computer-operated, meaning that there are no soldiers positioning the gun or loading enourmous ammo into it. it's so accurate that it can hit a mini cooper and blow it up from 39 miles away. let's give the american army this, because the americans always have to be the most technologically advanced. okay, now i am out of ideas, for now, so i'll be seeing u soon. i'm getting back tommorow, tuesday, around 3:00 or 3:30. see ya!

(Brandon) Finaly! I can't wait for you to get back. The runescape thing is okay, i can walk you through it. On the Matrix coats, i like Neo's better, and anyways, its more of that younger-guy superhero dude kicks everyone's you-know -whats. Morpheus's is more like, Older, but not old, kind of kick ur butt thing. To simplify, just do Neo's. And I think you're right, I should do all the action scenes and you should do all the boring scenes. Of course, we'll have to guide each other in the process, meaning It will take longer cause we'll have to see each other in person to accomplish anything, but like we said, were in no rush. I like your idea with Queen Rex's lair, whoops, ill write more later, i gotta go pick up my sister from school :( / :) at the same time. Oh well. See ya

(will) i wont talk anymore; ill shut it.